SEASON 1

SEASON 2

SEASON 3

SEASON 4

SEASON 5

FIGHT THE FUTURE

SEASON 6

SEASON 7

SEASON 8

SEASON 9

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Forest. It's the next morning and our heroes have made it through the night alive. The gang all heads out into the woods to investigate. DDD shows them a massive tree with an orange X painted on it that's been cut down. DDD is pissed that it was cut down. Hot Larry says that the FFS marks the trees and the loggers are only supposed to cut the trees that have a blue X painted on them. Mulder points out that the tree must be hundreds of years old and Scully posits that a huge tree like that would supply a whole lot of lumber. "Thousands of boards. Hell of a lot easier than taking a lot of smaller, younger trees," DDD snits. Jackhole Steve says that "monkey wrenchers" probably go around marking the trees. I seriously am about to kick the TV in. Hot Larry tells Jackhole Steve that the cut down tree has to be at least 500 years old. Mulder spots a green ring inside the tree trunk." What would this represent?" Hot Larry has no idea. Yo, Exposition? Don't even think about sneaking out. You've got some work to do. "Shut it." Don't get snitty with me, mister. You came over voluntarily. Scully posits that the center rings are the the older rings. Then Hot Larry gets to ride Exposition's train and says that each ring is a season of growth, "these are 500, 600 years old. They're a recorded history of rainfall and climate." But he has never seen that green ring before. He takes a core sample. Isn't that Scully's job? Back off, Park Ranger. Jackhole Steve starts getting pissy and he remarks that he has no idea how tree rings can tell them what happened to the loggers. Scully's lke, "That's what we're trying to figure out." He thinks they should be interrogating DDD. Ok, how could DDD have killed all 30 of those loggers and then make them disappear? Use your brain, Jackhole. Mulder, who actually uses his brain, doesn't think DDD had anything to do with it. Jackhole wants him arrested. Mulder tells him that DDD ain't going anywhere. Jackhole wants to know what's going to happen when DDD's buddies show up and they all disappear, too. Hot Larry's like, "Calm down, Jackhole. I'm just taking a core sample." Jackhole says that those loggers' families want answers and those answers can't be found in some stupid tree! Why is it taking him so long to die? "Only crime we're here to investigate is the death of that tree," DDD snarks. Actually, I beg to differ. I think there's another crime that should be investigated: what Scully's wearing. An egregiously large denim button down shirt and that tiny black vest? Good Lord. It's an outrage. I guess Scully's into the GA pregnancy wardrobe and it isn't doing her any favors. Jackhole says he's going down to Hot Larry's truck to call for some assistance. Then he stomps off like a big baby. Hot Larry calls after him but DDD's like, "let him go. Nobody's going to miss him anyways." Exposition lies back down on the couch, mumbling under his breath. Dude, at least this isn't a Season 9 episode. You should be thankful.

Logger Camp. Hot Larry is looking at his core sample through a microscope and sees that there's something living in the ring. "A tiny bug. It doesn't make sense." Scully checks out the sample and we get a shot of tiny mites crawling in the sample. Ew. Hot Larry says that parasites only attack the living parts of a tree, not the inner rings that have been dead for hundreds of years. Mulder guesses that maybe these bugs are feeding on the wood. Hot Larry checks out the microscope again and says that they're a "wood mite of some kind" and he's never seen them before. Mulder wonders if these bugs could've been living in the tree for hundreds of years. This doesn't make sense to Hot Larry since the wood is dead and the mites would need water to survive. Scully says that maybe there's a larger nest back at the tree. DDD walks in and asks if those bugs could make a cocoon. Then he comments that his buddy died and the loggers went missing soon after that tree was cut down. "Maybe they been lying there dormant for hundreds of years. Maybe they woke up hungry."

Forest. Speaking of hungry, guess who's coming for dinner? Why, it's Jackhole and I've been looking forward to this scene since he graced us with his presence. He's reached the truck, but he can't find a key and so he tries to hot wire it. It's not working, so he takes his flashlight and starts checking under the hood. He then hears a static humming. He grabs his shotgun and starts yelling for the "monkey wrenchers" to come on out and he knows what they're up to. Mark Snow hits us with "When Green Static Attacks! (Die, Jackhole, Die!)" as those ancient mites swarm. Jackhole freaks and jumps into the car. He shuts the doors and then finally gets the engine to start. The truck is stuck but once he gets it going, he drives into a big rock. Too bad, so sad. The green static bugs swarm the car, coming in through the ventiliation. Jackhole starts screaming. Ew. I hate the bugs, people. It was nice knowing you, Jackhole. Well, actually it wasn't. Bye bye!