SEASON 1

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SEASON 5

FIGHT THE FUTURE

SEASON 6

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SEASON 8

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“We got it!” an agent says, “it’s a 202 number!” Mulder and Bufe run over to the dot matrix printer it’s coming out on (OMG! Even cuter than the high-value American currency! Dot matrix!). Mulder grabs the paper, but quickly balls it up and tosses it away. “Forget it,” he says, “it’s Scully’s cellular number. They’re using her phone. We can’t trace it.” Tell that to the Patriot Act. (Not the same thing I realize, but man, that Patriot Act really steams me.)

Later, Mulder and a Bureau audio tech are listening to the recording of Lula’s call. They’re working on getting rid of the voices and isolating the airplane sounds. The tech tells Mulder he can even tell him what altitude the plane is at within a few hundred feet. Awesome. Back with the rest of the task force, Bufe (whom by now I’m guessing is running the op) tells everyone to take a seat, that Mulder’s got something. Another agent snarks “what, an alien virus, or new information on the Kennedy assassination?” Shit, dude, wait until Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man and you’ll get both! Bufe sticks up for him, “Mulder’s all right,” he says, “pay attention and you might learn something from the man.” This like, never happens again. I think the show was trying to make it up to the FBI after Squeeze made all the X-Philes kind of hate any FBI agent who’s names weren’t ‘Mulder’ or ‘Scully.’

Mulder enters. Remember that airplane on the map (like the ONLY thing on the map other than some squiggly lines and the word BALTIMORE)? Well, at that airport, take-offs run north-to-south, so Mulder pens in the area on the map where Scully might be. Roughly 1,000 households. Mulder thinks with everyone they have at their disposal they should be able to canvas the entire area in about 3 hours. The agents hop-to and go about doing that. On their way out Mulder reminds them that this one is important to him so do it right, huh? Aw.

Warren and Lula’s house/dump-by-the-airport: Whack is laying in the corner near where Scully is chained to the radiator. He rouses himself a bit from his diabetic stupor and asks Scully if there was snow. He says it kind of sweetly, and makes me feel kind of sorry for him. “Yes, Jack,” Scully says, urging him to remember, “there was lots of snow. It was December. It was the weekend after Thanksgiving.” I bet there wouldn’t be snow there these days, that time of year. Global warming is a real bitch. Whack remembers a red stove and Scully yeah’s him. There was a wood-burning snow right in the middle of the room. He’s starting to remember himself. It’s almost as if Jack is coming back. Suddenly, Whack slumps and then flashes to the bank. He’s both Willis and Dupree. Scully despairs—she’s lost him. When she looks over, he morphs into Warren Dupree for a split second. She’s weirded out. (Don’t worry, Scully, you’ll get used to that!) There’s a knock at the door; Lula grabs the gun and answers it. It’s a bible salesman. Man, salesmen never go door-to-door anymore. She tells him to go to hell and as he walks away, he speaks into his jacket; “target sighted.” WOO! The FBI always gets their man.

Back in the house, Whack is dead. Scully blames Lula, tells her it’s her fault. Lula drops her wedding ring in Whack’s lap. She doesn’t give a damn. She even gets down on her knees and taunts his corpse. Which… turns out to be not such a good idea, as Whack wasn’t actually dead and seizes the opportunity to grab Lula’s gun out of her belt. He tells her that she was why he came back.

Outside, all kinds of undercover guys and snipers are trying to get a bead on Lula inside the house. Mulder and the other FBI guys converge and get ready to storm the place. Remember that cool clear earpiece thingy with the wiggly cord that Willis had in the beginning of the episode? The ones you always see the CIA agents wearing in the movies? They must be expensive and the prop department must only have one of them, because Mulder and all the other agents are now wearing these crappy black things that look like Walkman earbuds. Anyway, they’re ready to go in.

Lula suddenly loves him again! She unconvincingly puts the ring back on and tells him that she has insulin in the other room-she’ll go get it! Whatever, lady. Whack tells Lula that that place he was telling her about (I’m guessing the bright light when he died) was beautiful and that there’s nothing to be afraid of. Then he shoots her. DAMN! Whack!

The FBI seize that moment to storm the place. Mulder busts in and finds Scully cuffed to the radiator, she calls to Jack, but Jack is gone. And just when no one is looking, Mark Snow’s Creepy String Plucks of Doom come in and Dupree’s tattoo magically disappears from Willis’s arm. I bet Scully wishes they came off that easily.

Back at the Hoover building, Scully is cleaning out Willis’s desk. Mulder brings her Willis’s watch which he got from the morgue. Scully gave it to him for his 35th birthday. Willis didn’t have any family, but there was a kid he was a Big Brother to that Scully’s going to go see tomorrow. She asks Mulder what she should tell him. He tells her to tell the kid the official story: “Fugitive Lula Phillips died yesterday in a shootout with Federal Agents, which also resulted in the death of Special Agent Jack Willis, killed in the line of duty.” Scully wants to know what she should tell herself. Mulder then just says goodnight and starts to walk away. Um, okay. Peace out, dude. Before he’s through the door though, Scully notices that Willis’s watch has stopped. At 6:47pm. Mulder reminds her that that was the exact time that Jack went into cardiac arrest at the hospital. Scully asks him what it means and Mulder only tells her that it means what she wants it to mean. Which kind of sucks, because I think she really needed something from Mulder here and didn’t get it. We fade to black. Don’t worry Scully, your show’s finale did the same thing to me. I really needed something from it, but I didn’t get it and it just faded to black.

And there you have my recap. Ending on the same depressing, sour note as the episode itself. Woo!