SEASON 1

SEASON 2

SEASON 3

SEASON 4

SEASON 5

FIGHT THE FUTURE

SEASON 6

SEASON 7

SEASON 8

SEASON 9

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Night-time. Shadow Guy is sort of furtively, but purposefully, making his way down a darkened street. He’s accosted by a homeless woman, but he blows her off, thereby demonstrating his evil nature and helping to justify what I believe will be his upcoming demise. A downtown bus pulls around the corner and stops. Shadow Guy gets on and the bus pulls out again. The Plinking Strings of Suspense clue us in to the fact that someone’s gonna be in big trouble, any time now. Shadow Guy gets off the bus and throws his red scarf around his neck. Uh-oh, something unseen (but I suspect fishing line manipulated by a stage-hand) is pulling the end of his scarf back towards the bus. Oh no! It’s caught in the door mechanism and winds itself round and round it for good measure. Shadow Guy calls out, but no one can hear him and the bus pulls out, dragging him with it. So far, he’s keeping up and the Black Dude driving the bus sees him and tries to put on the brakes, but an unseen foot is pressing down on the accelerator. Shadow Guy’s getting more and more frantic, screaming for help, then he loses his footing and he is being dragged by his neck. Black Dude is pumping the brakes, but it’s not helping. Finally the bus stops, but by then it’s too late. Michelle Ma Belle is sitting in the bus, looking out the window at Shadow Guy’s body, hanging by the neck from the door. Does her mother ever watch this kid? Dun DUNNNNN!!!!!

Back at the ol’ 14, and a cop is leading a woman up the stairs. Based on what she is wearing, perhaps she has been arrested for crimes against fashion (enormous buckle, anyone?), but it’s more likely she’s meant to be a hooker. Anyhoo, she’s just some background colour. Mulder and Scully are sitting with Michelle’s mother, who’s looking a lot less put-together than in her previous scene. Scully’s still wearing the mushroom suit, but has had the good taste to mostly conceal it under her trench coat, which is now allowing me to notice for the first time the sheer offensiveness of Mulder’s purple paisley tie. Have mercy! It’s like Prince designed Mulder’s outfit. Perhaps if he took the trench off, we’d be able to see where the arse has been cut completely out of the trousers. Not that I wouldn’t like that look on Mulder, but it’s not a fashion choice I’d endorse. Scully tells Mrs Bishop that Michelle has now witnessed two murders, and Mrs Bishop cries and says that Michelle is only eight years old and couldn’t have done anything, while Mulder assures her that Michelle is not being accused of any crime. Sure. Fine. Whatever. Scully asks if there’s anything that she hasn’t told them, but Mrs Bishop denies knowing anything at all. Scully tells her that the police department will put Mrs Bishop and Michelle up at the Sheraton until all this is sorted out. Nice. I’ll bet Mulder and Scully are at the Motel Six. Detective Maggie is back and she’s wearing a red vest this time. It’s got useless pockets on it too! What are they trying to tell us about Detective Maggie? She’s got some information for Mulder. It transpires that Shadow Guy’s name was Leon Felder and that before he started selling insurance, he was a cop out of the 14 and he used to be Detective Sleaze’s partner.

Mulder and Scully are now in what looks like a schoolroom, but is probably an incident room, going over the evidence. Mulder has the scent of chalk-dust in his nostrils and has written the names of all four cops involved in the same drug bust in Chinatown, three of whom are now dead. It’s become clear that Fiore was lying when he said he didn’t really know Barbala and Scully’s now realised there’s a page missing from Charlie Morris’s homicide file. She checks the log sheet, and Tony Fiore was the last person to have the file out. Uh-oh. He mustn’t be much of a cop to leave that sort of obvious evidence behind. So of course Mulder and Scully go along to his house to interview him, only to be confronted by Poor Man’s Minnie Driver in a flowered brunch coat. Yes, that is as horrible as it sounds. In a strong Noo Yawk accent, she tells Mulder and Scully that her husband didn’t come home last night. Mulder bulls his way inside. The next shot is of a little blue plastic diver in a fish tank. Mulder’s checking it out, in his role as aquarium connoisseur. Perhaps he’s thinking of giving up the fish altogether and getting plastic crap instead. At least it would cut down on the death toll. Poor Man’s Minnie Driver has some pretty tropical fish. She also has a pretty impressive collection of origami animals, little zebras and hippos, there’s even a pig, a frill-necked lizard a camel and an antelope. Woah, someone has way too much time on their hands. Unlike people who spend their time productively, recapping 15-year-old X-Files episodes. Ahem. Poor Man’s Minnie Driver comes back with a tray of coffee (she’s hospitable!) and tells Mulder and Scully that Tony told her he was working, but when she called the precinct, they told her he wasn’t rostered on. PMMD is very worried about her husband; she’s been on the phone all night calling family and friends looking for him. She asks Scully if Tony’s in any trouble; Scully asks her in turn if Tony knew Rudy Barbala and Leon Felder. She says she doesn’t and that she and Tony don’t normally socialise with other cops. Mulder brings up the origami collection, and PMMD drops the clanger that the origami was Charlie’s hobby. As in, Charlie Morris, her first husband, who was born in Japan and was Tony’s ex-partner. She was waiting for him to come home too, nine years ago, just like this. Poor Poor Man’s Minnie Driver. Apparently he was working on the whole set of animals from the painting hanging on the wall, but he never got to the giraffe.

Of course, this now gives Mulder a new theory. Scully does herself a favour and says it for him – reincarnation. Mulder, not to be outdone, then drones on: “Metempsychosis, transmigration, re-embodiment – call it what you will.” Ooh, Mulder, just keep on talking while I look at your pretty, pretty face. Scully busts him for basing his theory on the fact that Charlie Morris and Michelle Bishop both practice origami. Mulder comes straight back with the dolls and the two deaths. I have to agree with him, Scully. This time it’s making some sort of sense. As Mulder remarks, reincarnation is a tenet of many major religions, but Scully has her teeth set into the logic and asks him to explain how an eight-year-old girl can kill two grown men. Mulder comes out with the psychic abilities chestnut, but Scully isn’t buying what he’s selling, when he claims that they’re one short step away from proving the existence of the human soul. Scully wisely shuts up at this point, knowing that no matter what she says, Mulder will be all – “ Scully’s mouth is moving, but I wonder if I fed my fish before I left DC? Huh.”

Now we’re watching Michelle Ma Belle being hypnotised on the TV screen. Mulder just loves his hypnotherapy. Dr. Sheila is supervising the session but the hypnotist is another doctor. He takes Michelle back and she says she’s at home, it’s nighttime and she’s 24 years old. What the…? Scully is wearing a really nice blouse that comes all the way down to her thighs. Some might say it’s a bit piratey, but I like it. However, I could do without the vest covering it. Michelle yells, “No, we can’t! We can’t do this! It’s wrong!” Dr. Sheila has had enough – she storms out of the room to confront Mulder who tries to reassure her that Dr. Spitz (for that is his name) is experienced and will not harm Michelle, but Dr. Sheila says that it may push Michelle further into withdrawal and that it’s dangerous. Mulder comes back with “Is it any more dangerous than pumping her full of Thorazine?” Good one, Spooky. Michelle’s still screaming, “They’re killing me! They’re killing me!” I’ve just noticed that she’s also wearing a vest, a blue one with the useless pockets. That’s some fashion statement. I don’t remember owning anything remotely like that in the early nineties, and believe me; I’m old enough to remember. Mrs. Bishop can’t take it any more and bursts into the session, cuddling Michelle and soothing her.